If you have just found out about a betrayal, you are experiencing the second most difficult problem in a relationship. I'm imagining you are feeling as if you or your relationship has been viciously attacked and threatened. It is extremely traumatic for anyone to experience. You are probably no longer feeling safe and secure in the world and are probably having a hard time controlling your emotions, especially anxiety and anger. It is incredibly overwhelming and obsession with details about the cheating can cause eating and sleeping problems, which makes everything worse.

Infidelity is any emotional or sexual intimacy that violates trust

For the partner who has been unfaithful, at this place of discovery, there are reasons why the affair has left you feeling positive (feeling desired, more in control, having more choices), but your partner is feeling the complete opposite.  The animosity you felt for him or her may be starting to soften and most likely remorse is beginning to set in for the pain you have caused. Now you may wonder what can be done to heal this relationship and look at what has gotten you both to this point.

Complete recovery can happen gradually with counseling and both persons genuinely wanting to participate. You will need help learning how to shift the bitterness into positive growth and learn how to steer clear of danger zones in the future. But, if you are both willing and ready to open up and give all that it takes to repair your relationship.